under pressure...

this song has been running through my head for the past couple days.
while i am so excited and so grateful to have the opportunity to start a new job, i'm freaking out.
seriously.

it's intimidating to think about working outside the home again.
i've been working these past 3 years for sure,
but in a totally different way.

i'm also putting a lot of (unneeded according to my wonderful hubby) pressure
on myself to have certain things accomplished before i begin this new job.

my amazing (and by amazing, i mean totally kicks butt) sister-in-law is going to be taking care of the boys.
i have no worries about that.

i'm just not sure i remember how to balance work and home and life.
i honestly don't remember how i used to do it.
i've been spoiled by being able to work from home and run the house at the same time.
and at anytime...if laundry needs to be done...no big deal, i throw it in.
if we're out of milk...to the grocery store we go...
all that is about to change.

change is good.
right?
i'm not opposed to it.
i just think that this is a big one...
and i'm feeling under pressure.

a little bit of this, and a little bit of that

i am overdue on sam's 6th birthday post as well as eli's 3rd birthday post. i know. i just can't seem to write them without crying! my babies are getting so big, which i know they're supposed to, but maybe not so fast?

so, the boys are cracking us up lately. they are so entertaining that for the life of me, i can't remember what we did before we had kids!

eli is so into singing and has a constant stream of songs. these range from yo gabba gabba songs to michael jackson to radiohead to dance music to backyardigans to beyonce. he seems to have some musical talent, he can remember the lyrics and the tunes pretty well! we are starting to potty train with him, which is a joy (um. not really.) and he's turning out to be the most stubborn of our children so far...he continues to be cute, so i guess we'll keep him.

sam is the wittiest of the boys and comes up with some zingers (i usually post them on facebook, they're too good to not share!). he is doing really well in school and is the only person i know who looks forward to mondays! he is in love with kindergarden and his teacher and all the fun things that they get to do. he's reading like crazy and loves "projects" (read - VERY MESSY THINGS).

ben is growing like a weed and losing any little boy-ness he has left. he likes school, especially PE and recess and his friends. he is still very into star wars and getting into ghostbusters. i still see him directing movies or being involved in the film industry in some way. he loves movies and, like jim, has a soft spot for any 80's movie. he has a "devil may care" approach to his appearance and his glasses are usually askew and his shoes rarely tied. :) ben continues to have an amazing imagination and leads/directs his brothers on many adventures.

jim is now the director of e-communications for trailnet, a company that promotes active living. he is getting into the swing of things and enjoying the challenges of his job. you can catch up with him on twitter, where he tweets often. you can also catch him on facebook.

i'm still baby-sitting part time and enjoying the time with the boys. i have a job interview this friday that i'm nervous and excited about, so we'll have to see if that brings any changes to our schedule!?! i'm still searching for a good balance, but more at peace than i've been in a long time.

anyway...there's the scoop!

love,
jenn

resurrecting squirrels?

it was monday morning at the britton house. we looked out our front windows to see a squirrel laying in the middle of the street, freshly hit by a car.

elias, in his sweet (almostthreeyearold) innocence, said "awwww. wook, the squirrel. he sweeping." ben and sam quickly informed him that the squirrel was not sleeping, but dead. elias continued to argue "he just sweeping, he not dead".

the day wore on and the squirrel got flatter and flatter as more cars "hit" him. and elias finally conceded that the squirrel "hurt his head" and is not alive anymore...

fast forward to tuesday morning - the squirrel is gone from the street. elias comes out of his room for breakfast and sees another squirrel running around. "OH! WOOK! the squirrel - he not dead anymore!"

it's a conspiracy...an advent conspiracy

so we attend this church and we have been hearing a lot about this because windsor is all about celebrating christmas differently. and i love it! this was our first year participating in the advent conspiracy and it was amazing. we had such a different holiday experience. the stress of the holidays was minimal. we had an amazing christmas day with the boys...just being TOGETHER and playing TOGETHER with the gifts they received. our attitude has changed. and the change came softly, seeping gently into our lives.

the boys, caught up in the AC spirit, emptied their banks, without prompting from us, to donate to this organization and give clean water. and jim and i had so much fun coming up with ideas for gifts for our sons that would cause us to have more PRESENCE in their lives not just give a PRESENT. we have some new games to play together as a family, and each parent gets an individual date with ben and sam.

so about this change that's seeping in...

we were in the car and talking about our neighbor, jim (whose wife recently died), and i was asking the boys if they would like to help me make a meal to take over to him. they were excited about the idea and started offering suggestions of meals. then sam says "yeah! and maybe we can go eat at jim's house with him so he's not so lonely." and i began crying so hard i couldn't answer him. here i was trying to take the easy way out - just make a meal and drop it off - forgetting that PRESENCE means so much more than PRESENT. and sam called me out on that one. and i'm so thankful he did...

take 268

one of the most annoying things about me is that i like to try and rearrange everything. i admit it. i'm constantly doing it in my head. i'm constantly moving things around in our house. if i could just move this...here...everything would be great.

well now i'm doing it with my life. and it's a lot messier than i thought. but from all my rearranging experience, sometimes you have to make a mess in order to reorganize. life is messy anyway. i guess i'm just trying to clean up a little...